My life as an English Teacher... (Part 2)

It feels like only yesterday when I started my first day of teaching, set out from my home with a packed lunch and a book entitled ‘Teaching English For Dummies‘. The time flies very fast and it’s already beginning of the fourth semester. My life as M.Ed student has always been filled with surprises and difficulties. Sometimes, we are left to face these challenges alone (because we are adult learners). We then begin to think how much education has contributed much to the success of others. For this, I believe that my education as a young child has contributed much to who I am today. I believe that English was one of the many subjects that have helped shaped my future. Talking about belief, last weeks, Dr Nabila did mention about how I go about teaching my students. How effective have I been as a teacher and if I have not been effective, what would I do to improve myself.

How do I teach my students? Well I feel that one of my goals as a teacher is to help and guide my students so that they can teach themselves. I also beliefs, practices and attitudes are important for understanding and developing educational processes. They are closely linked to my strategies as teacher for coping with challenges in my daily professional life and general well-being. The beliefs, practices and attitudes help to shape my students’ learning environment and influence student motivation and achievement. As teacher, my beliefs on how I should teach my students involve strong emotion and judgment and therefore, I am quite resistant to change the way I teach them. Teaching involves multiple, simultaneous decisions related to content pedagogy, student relationships, praise and discipline, materials of instruction, and interactions with colleagues. Teachers do not possess templates to guide their work. Rather, teachers draw upon past experiences and their own ways of approaching problems. Hence, we develop our own solutions based on our personal understanding of the circumstances, an understanding that is rooted in our belief systems. For instance, some teachers might think that they must stand in front of the classroom to monitor the students’ learning and understanding. Actually not necessarily they must stand in front of the classroom but they might as well walk around the classroom. Some might also believe that they are the one who always do the work such as correcting, marking, preparing task for the students. It is because, by giving them task, and correcting them, the teachers are able to check the students’ understanding and maybe re-teach the lesson when necessary. Then again, teachers nowadays prefer to practice peer editing where their peers are responsible for assessing their friends’ piece of work. Students must have a clear understanding of what they are to look for in their peers' work. It also encourages students to become independent learners and can increase their motivation.
There is saying;

“There are many kinds of seeds in us, both good and bad. Some were planted
during our lifetime, and some were transmitted by our parents, our
ancestors, and our society. Every time we practice mindful living, we
plant healthy seeds and strengthen the healthy seeds already in us.
Healthy seeds function similarly to antibodies. If we plant wholesome,
healing, refreshing seeds, they will take care of the negative seeds,
even without our asking them. To succeed, we need to cultivate a good
reserve of refreshing seeds.”

by Thich Nhat Hanh, Peace Is Every Step


There are many questions from the society nowadays whether the teacher is qualified enough to teach or whether a teacher possess a good quality in teaching the students. Those question are certainly an intriguing one, and, for a teacher teaching at urban school like me, a pressing one. Our society these days are divided in to two different way of thinking on the education. Some believe that communicative methods are better than the traditional method of teaching but yet these two methods are both a successful way. In my opinion, every method in teaching is the same because the teacher delivers the same message to the students. Therefore there are pros and cons to it. The pros for humanistic traditional methods are, teachers shouldered too much of responsibilities for teaching in the classroom to make sure everything they thought were understood by the student. Thus it was a good method, where there was efficient communication between teacher and students. There was also the typical way and a controllable class where the teacher would teach on the whiteboard, explained, asks students to copy and made sure students paid attention and listen. I’m free to express myself and give tons of work with my 1 Melur class (of course good class) but, with my other class (the poor one), I have to be more animated. I need to dig up their ideas and induce them to speak up and give responses. Besides that, the traditional way in disciplining students in school and teaching them was an effective way in building a good characteristic student where students were afraid of their teacher and respect them. Well, it works for me though!

Nevertheless, we as teacher need to be creative and vary our teaching method. I do sometimes find students who are resistant to or unfamiliar with learner-centered teaching. By using Vigotsky’s theory and scaffold resistance learners, I usually use activities with small groups. They will have some individual activities and then some group activities. For both they will get credit. Students notice that working with peers really helps them to understand better the material and as a bonus, they get better marks. Because I allow them to work in groups, I have noticed that at the beginning they want to work by themselves but after having the discussion in small groups, they get to know each other and find out that it is worth working in groups. I think it really helps to create ‘learning communities’ among the students and it means that when they come to class, they feel as part of the social interaction and networking going on (Wood, Bruner, Ross, 1976). I believe that doing this (scaffolding) really makes a significant difference in the level of student resistance in my classes.

Besides that, in order to have the students to become communicatively competent, how do I go about teaching them is by creating a learning environment in my language class. Sometimes, before I start the lesson of the day, I observe my surrounding. Few questions revolve around my mind. Whether the physical space of the classroom is managed as I prepare the classroom for the students. Is the space warm and inviting? Do the students have access to necessary materials? Are the distracting features of a room eliminated? In my opinion, the most essential part of encouraging communicatively competent is the teachers who encourage students to do their best and to be excited about what they are going to learn. To be motivated, students must see the worth of the work that they are doing and the work others do. I demonstrate the value and show my students how their work is worthwhile and is connected to things that are important for them, including other learning and interests. One way that I use to encourage effort is through specific praise, telling my students specifically what it is that they are doing that is worthwhile and good. In my language class, there are lots of movable chairs, frequently, during my lesson, I ask students to sit in a semicircle so that they can see one another. Research reported by Beard and Hartley (1984) shows that people tend to talk to the person sitting opposite them rather than the people sitting next to each other and tend not to talk to one another.

What makes a great and effective teacher? Teaching is one of the most complicated jobs today. It demands broad knowledge of subject matter, enthusiasm, a caring attitude and a love of learning, and a desire to make a difference in the lives of young people. For instance, because I am the class teacher and subject teacher who teach English in that class, it arouses my interest in providing and creating self-access facility at the back of the class. It is just as simple as a cupboard or shelf containing activities that students can do on their own in order to give them extra practice or extension to what they do in class. The materials include magazine articles with questions and answers, puzzles, quizzes, graded readers and so on. Besides, the students are encouraged to bring in or produce materials for the self-access facility. In my opinion, self-access materials have the advantage of allowing the students to work at their own pace on an activity targeted to their needs which is not always possible in a regular classroom. If they finish their class work early or want to work on something during their free time, they can choose something from the self-access facility. As my students become more self-aware, I hope they will recognize that they need extra practice in certain areas and this facility will make sure that they are assisted in finding appropriate activities. Study after study shows the single most important factor determining the quality of the education a student receives is the quality of an effective teacher teaches.


However, not all teaching methods that I have applied work for all the lessons. Sometimes, I found my lessons were interesting and effective but sometimes it did not. There are also some of the factors that could hinder communicative classroom. Changes such as introducing to new syllabuses and new teaching method or to new peer groups and surroundings may leave the learners feeling emotionally insecure and vulnerable. For example, early last year, KBSM has introduced new syllabus of English Literature for Form 1. It is not only limiting the communicative environment in the classroom among the learners but sometimes the teachers as well. For example myself, I have undergone the course for English Literature new Cycle and need to teach the students the new syllabus. Surprisingly, the course was only conducted for two days and we have to come back to school and teach all literature elements of the new poems, short story, and graphic novel. I felt like I did not have enough exposure towards literature aspects and yet need to teach my students. Other factor that could hinder communicative classroom is high distractibility. For example in my school, the students are loaded with abundant of stuff. They might face this with difficulties and find it’s extra hard to settle the work. Other factor might be something on the background of the students. These include a poor or depressed background in which the child has no encouragement to read or to use language , in which there are no facilities for home work or private study , and in which the values the school are rejected and perhaps even held up to ridicule . In my school there are many cases of actual physical rejection, brought about by a broken home or by any other family problem. Some of the learners are lack of motivation. Motivation is one of the basic factors of participation. Motivation in simply language means interest. Learning is directly proportional to our interest in learning. Some students, they might have the feeling of fears. Sometimes, fear limits us even before we get startled. We do not try our best, because we are afraid of failure and perhaps ridicule.

Yes, I admitted sometimes I might not be an effective teacher and not having effective classroom learning. But most of the time, my ineffective lesson is due to the non participative students. Well, there is always room for improvement. Like what I have implemented in my classroom, I identify those students who have lack of lacking participation in the class due to their weaknesses. I always give extra and proper attention towards those students and involve them in different types of activities with peers. Besides, I encourage parents to give proper attention towards their children by having regular contact with me. The class should properly be cleaned and well decorated especially with English materials. In my opinion, proper sitting arrangement in the classroom can boost up students' participation so that students may have no difficulty in viewing the whiteboard, or listening to what I said. As a form teacher, I always ensure the smaller students will be seating at the front rows in order to have effective learning. Besides, by putting them seating next to different races might encourage them not to use their mother tongue all the time. Students who are facing language problems I gradually use with them a lot of activities involving listening and speaking such as presentations, dialogues, develop peer to peer relationship among students and other activities should be conducted in the classroom for increasing confidence.
I have also noticed that many teachers live and die by the student book. I mean, they do all the activities in the books and they do all the exercises in the teacher’s book. There is no personalization and students find it difficult to relate. Apparently, (for me) teachers are supposed to abandon their textbook and create their own banks of interesting and creative tasks. Personally, I do what works best for my students. In order to improve teaching, a good teacher need to adapt, able to negotiate and see what the students want because they are your audience and your clients. If the teachers only work with the student using books all the time, then they become predictable and the classes become boring. If I were a student and had a teacher that only did the workbook then I would miss many classes because I can just stay at home and do the same thing! Where is the value in coming to class to learn something from the teacher if I could do it on my own? The students nowadays learn for examination and I think that it (examination targets) kills the joy and excitement of some teachers in implementing or using creative tasks in their classroom.


I confessed those days I was not a good teacher. Because of the situation and the management of my school that kept pushing all the teachers around, I decided to turn towards the ‘easy way’ by focusing my classes on grammar and most of the time I conversed in mother tongue with the weaker classes (easy for me to convey message!). As a result, some students did not feel much motivated toward my class, I mean, towards English language. During those times, nothing much I could do. The situation pushed me to implement the traditional methodology. There are other factors that trigger me to change 360 degrees. Now, I feel guilty and regret of my own attitudes because I realize that I could have done something better for those girls. I am now more resourceful teacher, and aware of my social responsibility and I have been able to develop many meaningful strategies to work with my students. However, many issues rose that argue the classroom activities should as far as possible mirror the real world and use real world or authentic sources as the basis of classroom learning. Issues that aroused are authentic materials often contains tough and inappropriate language. Besides, authentic materials are burden for teachers. Then again, since English KBSM textbook has become much more authentic ‘look’, some reading passages in the textbook are design to look like magazine articles or real printed postcard, real menu, and even flight ticket. Very interesting!

Well, for me, in the beginning, I had a great challenge to change from the teacher-centered to the learner-centered approach. After years of teaching, I managed to focus on learners' learning; however I did not totally cast away my authority. I just tried to hit balance with my goal and objective to train active and independent learners. It was a tough mission, as you can imagine. I started it small, little by little. It's unlikely to change students' habit of depending on teachers to "feed" them overnight, you know. So, we need to have patience to teach them "How to Learn on Their Own." During that ‘dark era’, I believed that learners are unique and distinct. Their individuality and uniqueness must be attended to and taken into account if they are to engage in and take responsibility for their own learning. So, I had tons of patience those days. Now, I’m fine and comfortable with both methods. I think being very available and approachable teacher is important. Even though I try and train my students to be self-sufficient in their learning as much as possible, when they are starting out with the student-centered learning things I think they need to know that I am there as a support to help them if needed. Then they may be more willing to go out on a limb and try new things.

My life as an English Teacher... (Part 1)

As I start the new semester, I think it is an important idea to stop and think about who I am as a teacher. The word ‘teacher’ can mean a lot of things. As a teacher, I have always thought it was very helpful to actually know who I really want to be. I think it is important to have a clear self-concept of our own ‘teaching personality’. There are questions such as ‘who am I?’, or maybe more to the point, ‘who do I really want to be at the moments?’, or ‘do I have what some people occasionally refer to as a personality role model?’ Most people who have been students in college can probably recollect certain of these characters as being among their own teachers or lecturers. I feel that being a teacher has become a bit more directed when a person has a personality role model. Over the years of my teaching career, there have been a seemingly infinite number of times when I have been completely trapped as to what action to take when faced with a troubling situation. So I think it is great to have role model to provide guidance.
By taking five personality tests, I discovered that some interesting things about myself. First, were Carl Jung and Isabel Briggs Myers Personality test where I scored relatively high in the dimensions of introversion, intuition, feeling and judging (INFJ). According to Carl Jung's theory of the ego, described in 1921 in Psychological Types, a high score on intuition merely;
‘defined as "perception via the unconscious": using sense-perception only as a starting point, to bring forth ideas, images, possibilities, ways out of a blocked situation, by a process that is mostly unconscious.’



Me & my English colleague

Jung also said that a person, in whom intuition was dominant, acted not on the basis of rational judgment but on absolute strength of perception. As an intuitive, I have my own ideas about teaching and probably prefer to write my own syllabus so it would be a perfect fit for my students. I like to read between the lines and look for meaning rather than the hard facts. I value my own imagination and seriously trust my own intuitions and feeling. Well, obviously everyone uses their five senses to relate to any circumstances, but I prefer my ‘sixth sense’ to derive meanings, relationships, and possibilities from facts. I just believe my ‘senses’ would be able to solve problems or make interpretations. I remembered a situation that happened when I invigilated an examination. I followed through on my senses and apparently my suspicions were correct when I was able to intuit the students’ slickness of their moves which was so dismaying. I straightaway went to those who were cheated and immediately seized their papers. I decided that these students might learn some lessons. Besides, as an intuitive, I regularly rely on my senses of direction to get to a new place compared to my husband, who would look at a map or would likely read the instruction manual before assembling my kids’ toys.
Since I scored high in introversion, Marina Margaret Heiss (2002) describes me as a person who can only be emotionally intimate and fulfilled with a chosen few from among their long-term friends, family, or soul mates. Yes, I am an introvert, which means I am at my best when I have sometimes for myself to reflect, appreciate, and plan. I usually prefer being alone, or with my immediate family. When at school, I am very outgoing and friendly, but yet, sometimes the nonstop contact (with students, parents, colleagues, or administration) seems to just worn me out. I was aware of this possibility going into teaching, but still felt it was my calling, and was inspired by the fact that top celeb such as Oprah have the same personality type I have and they obviously contributed great things in dealing with extensive human contact. But, honestly, I sometimes wonder if it is possible to be truly happy and effective as a teacher and at the same time, be an introvert. Some days, I just really shrink from having a room full of students all day and the thought of attending a panel meeting is also often a downer. I am not really preferred to discuss situations or pour off ideas in the meeting. I would rather have time to think through them, and then apply the solutions. Although I love being a loner, however according to Myers Briggs, introverts like me, particularly and highly sensitive in handling others and tend to work well in an organizational structure. I really agree with Briggs enlightenment in which I have the capacity for multitasking jobs, which require privacy and concentration, but at the same time, I also do well in making contact with my colleagues. For me, lengthening the human relationship is not superficial as long as we are able to talk honestly and comfortably to our colleagues at work is much more important.

Being a feeler, again according to Myers Briggs, I am a person who considers how much I care about an issue and what I feel is right. Myers describes ‘feeling’ which refers to decisions based on someone’s personal values. Our society promotes for gender stereotyping by encouraging women to be more feeling in comparison to men. In reality, the statement is actually true. It is happening in my school where female teachers especially me, tend to be more lenient in giving marks to the students compared to male teachers. In terms of disciplinary strategies that I practice at school, I tend to be loving and communicative but wield little control and set few demands for mature behavior of my students. Besides, I instill warmth and nurturance as well as more classically warm laissez faire teaching style. Naturally I like to please others; and I praise and admire people easily because I think praise could be a motivational and rewarding tool in classroom learning.
For a mother of three like me, praising is crucial! I once read an article written by Michelle Dugger, a mom of 19 children saying that ‘The one who praises a child wins a child's heart’. I gave the idea a lot of thought and casually started trying it out on my three children. Then I started praising. I started complimenting my children’s’ good behavior, seeking to find the nice things to say and keeping criticism to a minimum. My voice sounded sugary sweet to my own ears and sometimes I even annoyed myself a little. My kids, on the other hand, ate it up like free ice – cream candy. Searching for areas where I can praise my children is very encouraging to me. It is like seeing a glass half full instead of half empty. Catching them in the act of being good is so much more fun than the opposite. Yeah, that’s me!
Because I scored high for ‘Judging’ in all Personality Tests, according to Jung, a person who dominant in judging personality interest in dealing with the world and in making decisions, expressing judgments, and put everything that they encounter into an understandable and rational system. Consequently, ‘judgers’ are quick to express judgments. Often they develop intuitions, and are convinced that they are right about things. Person of this type may find themselves frequently misunderstood. But for me, when it comes to dealing with the outer world, people tend to focus on making their own decisions because they tend to like things decided. I use my decision-making (Judging) in almost every aspects of my life. I seem to prefer a planned or orderly way of life, like to have things settled and organized, feel more comfortable when decisions are made, and like to bring life under control as much as possible.

As parent, planning and organizing are my thing because my entire life now revolves around preparation, setting up and making plans. Make shopping lists, shop once a week, cook while my baby is asleep even if it is hours before dinner time, set the breakfast table late at night if the mornings are stressful and hectic and so on. Oh! Not forgetting count at least an extra half hour just to get out through the front door if I have an important meeting at school. It is easy to get swamped down and overwhelmed by all of the logistical, planning & organizational aspects of running a home with three children and pets and toys always underfoot. I would just be overwhelmed and stressed the whole time. But it has turned out to be a great lesson on how I can be a better mom, a more organized mom, and given me some much needed faith in myself as to what I can do. When I spend just a little bit of time planning ahead everything goes a whole lot better for me and the kids. I find myself planning and I like the way this feels and don’t want to stop. It feels good being a better mom and I want to be the best mom I can be.

Well, being a judger, the following statements by Myers generally apply to me:
- I like to have things decided.
- I appear to be task oriented.
- I like to make lists of things to do.
- I like to get my work done before I can relax.
- I plan work to avoid rushing just before a deadline.
- Sometimes I focus so much on the goal that I miss new information.


So all in all, as INFJ, what do I need to do? And the even better question is: How can I improve myself to achieve my deepest desires while still maintaining myself as what I am now.

As an example, as introvert, intuitive, feeler and judger, I admit that I am a loner and need more friends. Finding more friends is a good idea and this will push me to overcome my fear, but will also give myself the limit I need. I will be taking best care of myself by keeping people in my life to achieve my goals, but also accepting that I am an introvert so I cannot push to exhaust myself. The truth is that we should identify our personality traits to help us constantly improve to learn and grow. We know ourselves best, so we should know when to give the limits and make the adjustments. The other thing I've had to learn the hard way is to try to draw people out to learn things about them. I have a tendency to tell them too much about myself too quickly, and in the end I always feel that I've betrayed myself somehow. But there is always a way to gently draw someone out without being too nosey or revealing too much of yourself right away. I have found that, spirituality is really important for me. Without that spiritual side of me, I sort of become weak. It is important for me to spend quiet time in nature, I consider that spiritual, and it nourishes me like nothing else can. When I attend to my spirituality, other important aspects of my life seem to fall into place much more easily.

Another thing that I really struggle and need room for improvement is the details. I think, I am just giving too much. An INFJ mother like me may sink toward the idea of getting the family and household organized and in order; regular baths for small children, weekly laundry, daily meals, and picking up mess; which sometimes can be exhausting. The INFJ mother may be likely to over-accommodation and self-sacrifice as a way to maintain family harmony. I am actually struggle with the result and perfection. Well, I think most INFJ spend time obsessing about details that don't matter to anyone else. I need to improve myself by letting go of the idea that I have to be all things to all people. All I need is just ask members of my family to choose the things I do regularly and let go of the rest of it for them to handle.

Last but not least I need to improve is by not praising too much. Mary Budd Rowe, a researcher at the University of Florida, discovered that students who were praised lavishly by their teachers were more tentative in their responses, more apt to answer in a questioning tone of voice ("Um, seven?"). They tended to back off from an idea they had proposed as soon as an adult disagreed with them. And they were less likely to persist with difficult tasks or share their ideas with other students. In short, I notice that praising too much of my kids does not restore their confidence level; eventually, it makes them feel less protected. It may even create a ‘nasty’ circle such that the more I load them with the praises; the more they seem to need it, so I praise them more. Sadly, the kids will grow into adults who continue to need someone else to stoke them on the head and tell them whether what they did was ‘good’, ‘perfect’, or ‘good job’. Surely this is not what we want for my daughters. So, less praise given to them but more of supporting and encouraging, the need to love, hug and help them feel good about themselves.

In a nutshell, as reminder to all INFJ as well to myself, in order to life a better life, I need to nourish my strengths and face my weaknesses. I really have to observe my weaknesses for what they are, and search ways to overcome them. Especially, by making an effort to use my judgment against my internal ideas, rather than ignoring other people’s thought. Besides, I need to go through my thoughts and take in everything without dismissing other people’s ideas prematurely. Instead of becoming obsessed with the details, I need to keep an eye on the big picture and take a big step back but make sure that I can still see the goal. Lastly, despites of everything else, all I need is just to relax.